Missing our dada
September 15th 2008 03:38
My husband's left our house more than a week ago. Because of this ordeal we're going through he couldn't stay in the house anymore. He couldn't take being in the same place with me.
It's too lengthy and complicated if I had to explain... but we're not separated yet... and I'm praying to God we won't get to that point.
My bigger problem is now my son. He's been looking for his Dada for every God given day of our lives and I can't quite explain to him. I just tell him, "Dada left and let's pray that he comes back.. ok?"
For some reason I think he understands. He does nod his head, tells me "Mommy, I want to Pray." and says the only prayer he knows...
I cry everytime I see him pray, knowing he really misses his dad. We both believe his dad is still coming back after he's sorted things out but the pain of knowing your son is missing a big part of his life even though it's just been a little over a week is just difficult to bear.
We miss him so much. We know he loves his son at least, if his love for me truly has diminished, at least he loves his son to even try and make this marriage work. The key is to TRY.
I firmly believe though, as much as the priest has said that his anger and resentments and all that's bothering him now is just overpowering his Love for me. The love he's had for me for the longest time.
Last friday when he dropped by to help in my son's school where we had to bring our beagle to show to class as part of their animal alphabet, my son was dancing with joy. I couldn't take it.
Lord God, let this pain end....My son deserves a father and no one else can be a better father than my husband.
It's too lengthy and complicated if I had to explain... but we're not separated yet... and I'm praying to God we won't get to that point.
My bigger problem is now my son. He's been looking for his Dada for every God given day of our lives and I can't quite explain to him. I just tell him, "Dada left and let's pray that he comes back.. ok?"
For some reason I think he understands. He does nod his head, tells me "Mommy, I want to Pray." and says the only prayer he knows...
Angel of God,
my guardian dear,
to whom God's love commits me here,
ever this day,
be at my side
to light and guard,
to rule and guide.
AMEN.
my guardian dear,
to whom God's love commits me here,
ever this day,
be at my side
to light and guard,
to rule and guide.
AMEN.
I cry everytime I see him pray, knowing he really misses his dad. We both believe his dad is still coming back after he's sorted things out but the pain of knowing your son is missing a big part of his life even though it's just been a little over a week is just difficult to bear.
We miss him so much. We know he loves his son at least, if his love for me truly has diminished, at least he loves his son to even try and make this marriage work. The key is to TRY.
I firmly believe though, as much as the priest has said that his anger and resentments and all that's bothering him now is just overpowering his Love for me. The love he's had for me for the longest time.
Last friday when he dropped by to help in my son's school where we had to bring our beagle to show to class as part of their animal alphabet, my son was dancing with joy. I couldn't take it.
Lord God, let this pain end....My son deserves a father and no one else can be a better father than my husband.
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Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
I'm sorry to hear this. I hope that you and your husband get through the difficult time and that you and your little boy are OK.
Best wishes,
Tracy
Comment by Hazel Castillo
Working Title
Cirrus Cloud
Movie Dime
Parent Adventures
All I can really do is wait and wait (and based on the book Conversations with God --- CHOOSE it to happen
It's a truly tough time, been in this "place" for almost 4 months yet I'm still holding on. I'd rather hold on as long as I can than regret something for the rest of my life. oh dear prayers are all I'm asking from almost anyone I know.
Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
Yes, I would say that holding on would be the best thing to do. I don't imagine it's easy at all though. I'm glad your prayers help.
Tracy
Comment by Sara Dobson
Love Mate
Parents Precinct
The Travel Map
My Turn
Reading this has just brought tears to my eyes and a lump to my throat. I hope eveyt thing works out. And I hope your son at least gets to visit his dad soon
Comment by Hazel Castillo
Working Title
Cirrus Cloud
Movie Dime
Parent Adventures
Thank you for your hopes and wishes.
Your last wish/hope should be something different though... I Hope my son gets a visit from his dad soon...
thanks again Sara. There's no way to take this pain away except for our Dada to come back.
Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Current Business News
Movie Train
Artist Quirk
Comment by Hazel Castillo
Working Title
Cirrus Cloud
Movie Dime
Parent Adventures
Thank you again for the well wishes.