Parenting vs. Career
May 18th 2008 22:33
Often for women, especially careerwomen, when they find out they're pregnant or on "the family way" they get a lot of questions about what they plan to do with their careers.
What about your job? Will you keep doing your work? How are you going to take care of both?
It's almost insulting when these questions are asked because it insinuates that a mother (or mother-to-be) has to choose between parenting and her career. It doesn't seem to make sense to people that parenting and career can exist together.
I just read a blog entry from CNN talking about how maternity leaves affect a mother's career/work. It mentioned about a lawsuit filed by the federal government for three women, mostly in the senior management positions who experienced discrimination as soon as they informed the company (BLOOMBERG -- yes the financial information company) that they're soon to be mothers.
From the complete report at MSNBC which was more than 6 months ago, all three women were demoted, reduced salaries and benefits soon as they got back from their maternity leaves. On a more recent report from newsday.com, the number has risen from three to 58 and is very likely to rise even higher.
In my opinion it is very old-fashioned (for the lack of a better term). I live in Asia where most countries, nations and cultures are very patriarchal and value men more than women, heck women then were not even allowed to study, but I'm in a pretty good position in my company. I became pregnant just when I have just gotten a promotion -- it was actually a sort of apprenticeship program which I passed after three months and then got the promotion.
I've been promoted to a higher position since then and have been here for almost 2 years. It was more of my choice why I haven't risen up any higher. I have been offered or had the chance twice since I got to where I am, but because I know what the next job entails, I decided to not grab the opportunity. I know that if I do it will only take more time from my son, which I will not sacrifice at all.
I find it surprising that this report is coming from New York, in the US where we always think people are more open minded and understand equal opportunity better. The company I work for is based in the US and we have a few expatriates at the top posts here but none of them ever discriminated us for being asians, for being women or for being mothers. If anything they praise us and tried hard to work around us to make sure we don't have to choose between parenting and career.
I believe if we have to choose, it'll have to come from us, the mothers. It should never be triggere by work or your boss or the company.
I'd love to hear from other parents/mothers out there who've had both good and bad experiences in the workplace when you announced you're going to be a parent soon.
What about your job? Will you keep doing your work? How are you going to take care of both?
It's almost insulting when these questions are asked because it insinuates that a mother (or mother-to-be) has to choose between parenting and her career. It doesn't seem to make sense to people that parenting and career can exist together.
I just read a blog entry from CNN talking about how maternity leaves affect a mother's career/work. It mentioned about a lawsuit filed by the federal government for three women, mostly in the senior management positions who experienced discrimination as soon as they informed the company (BLOOMBERG -- yes the financial information company) that they're soon to be mothers.
From the complete report at MSNBC which was more than 6 months ago, all three women were demoted, reduced salaries and benefits soon as they got back from their maternity leaves. On a more recent report from newsday.com, the number has risen from three to 58 and is very likely to rise even higher.
i love this Newsweek cover
In my opinion it is very old-fashioned (for the lack of a better term). I live in Asia where most countries, nations and cultures are very patriarchal and value men more than women, heck women then were not even allowed to study, but I'm in a pretty good position in my company. I became pregnant just when I have just gotten a promotion -- it was actually a sort of apprenticeship program which I passed after three months and then got the promotion.
I've been promoted to a higher position since then and have been here for almost 2 years. It was more of my choice why I haven't risen up any higher. I have been offered or had the chance twice since I got to where I am, but because I know what the next job entails, I decided to not grab the opportunity. I know that if I do it will only take more time from my son, which I will not sacrifice at all.
I find it surprising that this report is coming from New York, in the US where we always think people are more open minded and understand equal opportunity better. The company I work for is based in the US and we have a few expatriates at the top posts here but none of them ever discriminated us for being asians, for being women or for being mothers. If anything they praise us and tried hard to work around us to make sure we don't have to choose between parenting and career.
I believe if we have to choose, it'll have to come from us, the mothers. It should never be triggere by work or your boss or the company.
I'd love to hear from other parents/mothers out there who've had both good and bad experiences in the workplace when you announced you're going to be a parent soon.
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Comment by Hope
Gifted Parenting
Freelance For Life
Comment by Hazel Castillo
Cirrus Cloud
Parent Adventures
I guess it all depends on where we are -- financially, geographically even.
Where I am from, there aren't much opportunities to work at home, if there are it won't be enough to support a family.
I've been wanting to do exactly what you're doing...
Comment by Mrs M
Mum's Word
I had a bad experience when I announced I was pregnant. Basically my position was made redundant (while I was still there) but later found out that the job was recreated - just had a different title.
I didn't pursue it legally because becoming a first time mum was taking up all of my energy. I suppose that's how a lot of people get away with it - women at their most vulnerable.
I have since decided that I was going to be my own boss so I do contract work now.
Love & stuff
Mrs M
Comment by Hazel Castillo
Cirrus Cloud
Parent Adventures
Good for you Mrs M... it's funny how these things are done to women yet women can get over them and be successful in whatever they eventually choose to do...
you can always look for a new job.. but not have another kid...
thanks for the story Ms. M!